Sunday, February 17, 2008

The unnamed poem

This is the day when I began to realize my shortcomings

I always thought that I could push myself to the limitations of my ability

But I was wrong in that kind of belief since I have my limitations too

I just don’t know when to give up on this

It’s been such a little while since we became friends

And then we became closer than we expected

Until such time came when we began to realize that both of us felt something

And that is to fall in love in a very wrong time

This day is suppose to be a happy day since it is the day we commemorate love

But I am here spending time with myself in my room alone

It’s been raining since yesterday and I tried to let the time slip

But I just can’t deny the fact that something deep inside me is lacking

Last night was a terrible night for both of us

I just don’t know if it was the will of the Supreme Being or it was a coincidence

I just don’t know if I will be happy or not

All I felt that time was fear and I always think about you every moment

When we met just this morning, I hold on to my tears

I controlled my emotions when I saw your eyes

I saw loneliness; fear, and a bit of regret

Yet there is still hope that is still struggling to keep itself alive

I just don’t know where my feelings for you will be going to bring me

I just don’t know when will I surrender

I just don’t know what to do as of the moment

With all honesty, I am now on the brink of giving you up

I really pitied you this morning

Your eyes seemed to tell many things yet we just opted to be silent

I wanted to speak to you yet I controlled myself

For silence that time was the best and the kindest thing to do this time

I tried to sleep earlier just to do away with what I feel

But I just can’t close my eyes

No matter what I do this time, I am still restless

For the truth is, you are always inside my lonely mind

I just don’t know why I fell in love with you

I know there are girls who are much better than you

No matter how I tried to take this feeling away

I just can’t… I just can’t because I do love you

It’s hard for me and I just don’t know if I can survive this situation

I am now free at last but you are not

I have been telling you several times that I will wait

Good Lord! Please help me out with this for I just don’t know what to do

True love can be tested in letting someone go

Things began to get more complicated than before

This place is too small for the two of us

I just don’t know if there is still chance for me to have you

And now that we are on the brink of closing the doors

I just cannot accept the fact that things are turning against us

But I know this is the best way for now

Saying goodbye though it really hurts from the inside

As you go back to your former life

Let me say sorry for the nuisance

Allow me to say thank you for the moments we shared

And let me say I wish you all the best in this world

I just don’t know how to give up… really

In time, I know… I will be winning you back

But I need to entrust everything to the One who has the will

I will just close my eyes this time and hope

If ever I will be given another chance to have you

I know that will never be coincidental anymore

I know this will going to kill my heart out

But we need to separate ways this time… for the good of us

I wish I could still see your face in time

I wish I could spend time with you just like what we always do

I wish… I just simply wish that you would be free

For I really wish that I could win your heart

I know this will be very difficult

I know this will going to hurt both you and I

And I know that anything will happen after this

Whew! My heart is already crying as I am writing this poem for you

I want you to know that I do love you

I do love you because my world becomes alive when you arrived

But things are not yet turning towards our favor

And so allow me to say the last things on my mind before I will run out of words

I really appreciate you for your goodness

I thank you for the love you gave to me

No matter what will happen to us, always remember that I do love you

But we need to accept the fact that it is not yet the right time

Is it really not right for us?

Who then defines when is the right time?

Who then has the right to say that it is right?

Al I know is it is not yet fitting for us

I love you… for you are important to me

I need you because I love you

But then I want you to grow and be happy

And so, even though this will be painful to me… I need to say good-bye to you

As I end this short poem, I want you to know how important you are to me

Despite the complicatedness of the situation, I still do love you; and I know I will

But letting us go for the moment will allow us to grow. And so let me say good-bye to you

I want you to know that wherever I go, you will always remain in my heart… until we meet again

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